WHAT IF

WHAT IF is that self conscious question we seem to ask ourselves whenever something goes right or wrong in our lives. WHAT IF I would have said yes? WHAT IF I would have made a right? WHAT IF I wouldn’t have said that. These thoughts create an alternate outcome from reality. In the movie curious case of Benjamin Button, Brad Pitt’s character explains that our world is just a collection of actions that are all interdependent of each other. Everything happens for a reason and there is no real way of knowing what that outcome would have been if situations were different. We are only left with what actually happened. And even with this being true we still tend to imagine things happening a different way or to second guess our actions as if things could have better or worst. I often times think WHAT IF for most of the good, bad, or unique situation I have been involved in. WHAT IF I had been shot that night, WHAT IF I hadn’t won the lottery that day, WHAT IF I hadn’t been robbed, WHAT IF I hadn’t sent the courtesy email after being rejected from the position, WHAT IF I had never went to china, WHAT IF I had killed them that night. I think my WHAT IFs aren’t about changing reality but appreciating every scenario and decision I have made. This week I resigned from my prestigious, high ranking position with a very prominent African American organization. I rose up the ranks in a matter of 2 years. I had power, influence, and respect amongst the organizations members and leaders. I traveled internationally, dine on the finest steaks, stayed in the luxury hotels, and met everyone from movie stars, CEOs, foreign ambassadors and national icons. I had luxurious flight accommodations that included free luggage, first class upgrades, and free flights. I sat on national planning teams that included that included a national dedication of the first African American national monument in DC. Every major organization, celebrity, and government official was involved, including President Obama. I gave all of this up, sold everything I owned, and booked a one way ticket to Los Angeles. Now I am on a flight into the unknown, no job, 2 bags of clothes, 1 bag of books, and a backpack. Am I crazy? WHAT IF I was…